Sometimes, even the very best are not spared the mental struggles of staying at the top and living up to the expectations that come with greatness. Virat Kohli went through a similar phase after stepping down as India captain, to the point where he began doubting himself. And if it was not for former India head coach Rahul Dravid and batting coach Vikram Rathour, Kohli admitted he may never have found joy in cricket again.
Speaking at the RCB Innovation Lab Indian Sports Summit Powered by Leaders, held at the Centre for Sports Excellence in Bengaluru on Tuesday, Kohli reflected on the difficult period following the end of his Test captaincy stint in early 2022. It came during one of the most turbulent phases in Indian cricket, with Kohli at loggerheads with then BCCI president Sourav Ganguly after reportedly being removed as ODI captain shortly after stepping down from T20I leadership in late 2021.
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It all unfolded during Kohli’s century drought across formats, which lasted from 2020 to 2022. He no longer had former India head coach Ravi Shastri by his side either, after the latter’s tenure ended in 2021. But in Dravid and Rathour, Kohli found a support system that helped him through the toughest phase of his career.
“I’ve said this many times about Rahul bhai and Vikram Rathour. I had a great phase in Test cricket, and whenever I meet them, I thank them from the bottom of my heart because they took care of me in a way that made me feel like I wanted to play for them,” Kohli said.
“I wanted to perform, grind it out, and do the hard work because they were so caring and nurturing. They reminded me of everything I had done so far – something you never really sit down and think about as a player.”
Kohli eventually ended his drought with a T20I century in the 2022 Asia Cup before scoring two Test hundreds in 2023. A few months later, he produced a record-breaking campaign in the ODI World Cup at home.
Kohli said Dravid’s own experience at the highest level helped him understand the fears and self-doubt even senior players continue to battle.
“As players, you’re always walking a very thin line between being cautious and being insecure. You constantly feel like you’re never good enough – that imposter syndrome is always there,” Kohli said.
“Even today, when I go into the nets, I still think: these youngsters are watching. If I have a bad session, they’ll probably wonder, ‘Is this the guy who’s been playing for 20 years?’ That thought is always there.
“Rahul bhai understood that because he had experienced it himself at the highest level. Vikram had been around for years too. They understood what I was feeling and genuinely took care of me mentally. That put me in a space where I could enjoy my cricket again.”
Kohli said he only began opening up about his mental struggles after stepping down as India captain.
“The reason you’re given a leadership role is because people believe you can take on more and still manage it. In many ways, leadership is more about management than even coaching. It’s about understanding the people playing with you and for you, and figuring out how to get the best out of them,” he said.
Kohli admitted that during his captaincy stint, he became so consumed by the responsibility of leading the team that he stopped paying attention to his own emotions. Looking back, he realised that for nearly nine years, nobody had really asked him how he was doing mentally.
“To do that, you constantly have to be in a space where you’re not focused on yourself. You don’t even think about whether someone is going to ask you, ‘Are you okay?’ That thought doesn’t even cross your mind. I looked back and realised that no one had really asked me that question for almost nine years – ‘How are you doing?'”